'What is the thing that you fear the most?". This is the question that was asked by my Thinking Skills lecturer. Honestly, this question circulated my mind for some time now. When we talked about fear, the first thing that popped onto my mind was "what is fear?"."why we need fear in our life?" and "why do we feel fear?" Is it a necessity in our life? To feel completely powerless, feeling your heart beating so fast that you wish that the earth will swallow you up, but that question is for another post, for now what is important is the very fundamental question.
The thing that I fear the most is knowing the fact that it is almost impossible for me to achieve my dream, it is not relevant to the topic regarding what my dream is but every time I picture myself achieving it, standing with pride, I could not help myself from doubting my capabilities "what if I failed?", "What if I give up along the way?", what if? what if? those are the words that keep repeating in my mind. Honestly, I hate myself, I hate myself for being a weak man that I am now, too weak to change the world and too weak to even change myself. When I look at all the challenges that i will face, I realised that the true enemy to fear is not the trouble and rubble along the way, but myself. YES!! That is the correct word and way to express it, I fear myself, I fear that I will change, I fear that I will give up and abandoned my dream, I fear that in the end I will leave behind the things that I loved. But in the end I realised, no matter how afraid I am, I just have to smile and walk along the journey.
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